Why Do Bad Things Happen to Good People?!

Why Do Bad Things Happen to Good People?!

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A few months ago I had the privilege of speaking to a group of high school girls. The theme of my topic was “You are the Salt of the Earth” and I spoke from the stance of young ladies remaining pure and celibate prior to marriage; encouraging them to make a commitment to not have sex until they marry. And that regardless of what their peers were doing, as Christians we should be compelled to do what the Word of God says. Despite losing my train of thought in the beginning – praise be to God for the Holy Spirit who bring all things to our remembrance, I was able to quickly recovery. My discussion was the easy part of the presentation – the Q&A session was the hard part.

I was extremely impressed with the questions the young ladies asked. They were well thought out and mature. One question that really stuck out for me was, “if God wants us to remain pure until we marry, why does He allow women to get raped?” When I read that question, I went numb for about 3 seconds and quickly put the question at the bottom of the stack because I knew there would have to be a lead-in to answering this.

After answering and discussing all of the other questions, I dug-in to the most challenging of them all last, because I myself needed a moment to re-group and allow the Holy Spirit to give me words to share with the young ladies. Just prior to me answering this question one of the parents, a mom, in attendance shared a brief testimony about how she had been molested as a child; how this affected her, and her road to forgiveness and healing. There was my lead-in! And inside I was screaming, THANK YOU HOLY SPIRIT.

Romans8-28I then proceeded to share with the girls that I had saved the most challenging question for last, “if God wants us to remain pure until we marry, why does He allow women to get raped?” The Cliff Notes version of my answer was that we live in a fallen world, and that bad things happen to good people. But we must still trust and believe God and His Word that ALL things work together for good for those who love Christ …” I used the mom’s testimony as an example – what the enemy meant for evil, through Christ she is able to share her testimony of healing and forgiveness and bless and encourage other people. And that we may not understand why God allows for certain things to happen to us, we must trust Him that eventually it will work out for our good and He will ultimately get the glory!


Terry Cato About Terry Cato

Terry Cato is a Talk Show Host, Author and relationship blogger. She is the Founder of Relationships 411, a blog community dedicated to healthy relationships and marriages. She is the Host of Real Talk w/Terry a Bay Area talk show focusing on relationship and lifestyle topics. Her memoir, “No Longer a Bridesmaid!” chronicles the 7 years she was single, celibate and believing God for a husband. Feel Free to Follow Terry on Twitter and visit her website for more information about the Author.


  1. Terry,

    What a beautiful answer to this question! I love what you pointed out here, that God uses our pain. He doesn’t ignore it. He doesn’t brush it aside or fail to see it. He values us and our experiences, and He will use them to help others and to show the world what a strong and loving Father he is.

  2. Tina Dorward says:

    Thanks for sharing this experience Terry, and thanks for your courage in speaking to a topic that definitely wasn’t easy. Encouraging teens to remain pure before marriage definitely goes against the grain of what they usually hear and are encouraged to do each day by peers and our culture. Even many parents feel it is ridiculous to teach/preach abstinence, yet this is what our Holy Father calls us to. I applaud your courage and insights you gave these girls and you might never know the difference your being there made but I’m sure it made a difference to many of them. God bless.

  3. Janet K Brown (@janetkbrowntx) says:

    Thank you, Terry, for being real & not shirking from answering so difficult a question. I pray God bless your ministry. I truly believe this message needs to go out to many hurting girls out there. God does answer all our questions. He is forever faithful.

  4. Yes, Cherie, God sees all and knows all. Thank you for your words of encouragement!! Blessings my sister!

  5. I agree Tina! This is such a hard topic. But as witnesses of Christ we must boldly share what God’s Word says. Blessings to you!

  6. Amen Janet!!! Thanks for your encouraging words!

  7. When asked those hard questions, we tend to panic. Bravo to you for waiting until that lead-in came along! That is a great reminder for all of us. God does help us with those tough questions, if we let him.

  8. Terry,

    This continues to be an age old question. One I can identify with both from my days as a youth and my days working with young people. When I read the question, ‘if God loves us, why does he allow bad things to happen to good people?’, the first thing that came to mind was the misconception that people are ‘good’! Perhaps a more intriguing and intellectual question would be are humans capable of being ‘good’!? After all, being good denotes one’s ability to behave in accordance with societal norms and in line with the law. Ultimately, the underlying concern is can out righteousness be earned with good behavior!!??Certainly the bible says we are RIGHTEOUS (speaking of course of Born again Christians). We are the righteousness of God…but that speaks of my spiritual Right standing with God; not my behavioral and moral shortcomings as a man. God wants us to know that righteousness has been GIVEN to every believer through Jesus and it is FREE. Understanding this concept, takes the focus off of the individual and places the focus on Christ. The enemies tactic is to make you focus on your BEHAVIOR instead of Jesus’ behavior. He specializes in making you focus on your inadequacy instead of Jesus’ perfectection. Thus, if we are constantly asking why do bad things happen to good people, we assume there is a good nature in humankind and fail to rely on the grace of God to propel, lead, and guide us into all truth. Certainly, God does not want bad things to happen to his children: However, there is an enemy at work to steal, kill, and destroy! When those bad things happen, we must recognize it is the enemy trying to steal from us, kill us, or destroy us! However, before he can do either of those, he will accuse you of being UNrighteous and inadequate. The first name of Satan is “the accuser”! Don’t be accused. Be loved!

    • Thanks for responding Allen. You picked up on that … “Why do bad things happen to ‘good’ people” … Which is quite often the human response to trials, tribulation and adversity. I threw that in the title. The actual question asked was, “if God wants us to remain pure until we marry, why does he allow women to get raped?”

      I love what you said, “there is an enemy at work to steal, kill, and destroy!… we must recognize it is the enemy…”

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