When Our Sought after Advice Goes Unheeded

When Our Sought after Advice Goes Unheeded

photo by Jean Ann Williams

As I write this, I’m pressed on every side with extended family and their issues, making my heart break like marbles after a scatter shot.

Recently, police authorities called with news the remains of a body they found in the thick underbrush of the forest is indeed my lost brother. He went missing a year and a half ago. I’m heart sick all over again.

When my brother first went missing, he became penniless except for a sum which would have paid for a proper burial.

Against my sought after counsel, this sum, which I thought was set aside, was spent. I’m distressed over this because my advice was asked for, and I gave it in hopes later people wouldn’t be scrambling to find the funds to give my brother a proper burial. If indeed he was ever found.

God can and does give to His children who are in need, and sometimes we need patience to use such gifts wisely. This spent sum was an out-of-the-blue gift, now needed to put my brother’s remains to rest. The same amount to be exact, which proves to me, it was a gift from our Lord.

Have I ever made impatient mistakes? Yes, I have, and too numerous to count. Even though this whole affair is causing unnecessary stress within the family, I’ve forgiven them.

At first I was angry and hurt. Hurt by the excuses hurled at me, for how dare I hold them accountable. For I had asked the question with love in my heart and tone, “I thought you had set aside the gift for when or if my brother’s remains were found?”

My prayer now is this harsh lesson will be a teachable moment for those involved. They will see how their actions have made worse an already difficult time in saying a permanent goodbye to my brother.

Father, please take away the distress in my heart. Please help me to not take back the forgiveness, and to move on in the work You would have me do. For all Your glory. In Jesus’ name. Amen.

Jean Ann Williams About Jean Ann Williams

Jean Ann Williams lives in Southern Oregon with her husband Jim. Although one of their children has passed on to the Great Beyond, their two remaining children have blessed them with thirteen grandchildren, their Baker’s Dozen. Jean Ann keeps up two blogs: the first is about the writing life Jean Ann Williams: Author, and Love Truth where she writes of how God continues to encourage and bless her after her son’s suicide in 2004.


  1. Jean Ann, I can’t imagine going through that kind of sorrow. You have endured so much, yet you remain faithful. You stand as a role model for believers everywhere.

  2. Thank you, Linda! This was a more difficult topic to write about without sounding so negative. I don’t like negative, but this world can be harsh. Thank you, for being encouraging.

  3. Jean Ann, I am so sorry for your loss. I can’t imagine dealing with the uncertainty of not knowing what had happened to your brother and now to deal with his death must be devastating. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

  4. Thank you for taking time to respond to my post, Patti! It’s been a rough time for sure. I’ll always miss my brother Lee. Prayers greatly appreciated.

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