And On And On and On…

And On And On and On…

Doctor’s appointments—treatments—medicine—side effects—more doctors—more treatments—more side effects….and on and on and….

As I battle my brain tumors I don’t mind admitting there are days when I want to give up. And even days I do give up, but only for a little while. After I’ve had my pity party, I take a deep breath and tell God I trust Him and know that he will work all things for the good of those who love Him—that’s me! That has become one of my mantras these days.

I sometimes wonder how people who aren’t Christians get through the really tough times without God there to support us, love us, and give us hugs. I’m so incredibly grateful that God is taking this journey with me.

When you’re dealing with a chronic problem, sometimes it all gets to be too much. It seems as if it will never end. It doesn’t matter if the problem is physical, emotional, or just circumstances in your life, the pain can overwhelm if we let it.  Life can knock us down when we least expect it. That’s when we have a choice to make: give up or get up.

Proverbs 24: 16 says: For though the righteous fall seven times, they rise again. As Christians God expects us to get back up and keep going. And not just keep going but do it with a smile as much as possible.   It’s easy to trust God when things are going fairly good, but the difficult times test our faith.

It’s not always easy but one of the things that has helped me immensely is God’s own words. I have a stack of index cards with Bible verses written on them. I read them again and again. This puts God’s truth, wisdom, love, and strength in m me. On any given day a specific verse will speak to me. As I go through the day, I’ll remind myself of that verse.

We are all God’s ambassadors. People want to know if God is real, if Christianity is real, if our faith is real. The way they do that is by watching Christians as we “do life.” I consider my brain tumors as one way I can show others that I trust God no matter what the circumstance. I don’t know who is watching me, but I know someone is.

And so even though I fall, I will keep getting back up—not because I am strong, but through God’s strength.

Lillian Duncan About Lillian Duncan

Lillian Duncan writes stories of faith mingled with murder & mayhem. She writes the type of books she loves to read—action-filled suspense with a touch of romance that demonstrates God’s love for all of us. Visit her website for more info.


  1. I admire your stength in Him, Lillian. I know many people can relate to this. Chronic health problems can take a toll, and you’re right, I’m not sure how I’d survive without my faith. Thanks so much for sharing this.

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